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Do as you say and Random acts of generosity and kindness October 1, 2014

Filed under: Family,Healthy,Other — Desiree @ 2:26 pm
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I had many, many titles for this post.

Backseat Therapist
Little Humans Hear All
Love Thyself as much as you love others
Why can we all just get along… with ourselves?
…and the list could go on and on.

So, this will be a two-part post because while I was thinking of what to write a second, amazing thing happened to me this morning and it deserves to be shared as well.

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We always hear that we should be saying body positive things to our children, mostly so they don’t grow up self-conscience about their bodies, but also so they can learn that body acceptance, of their own and other’s is equally important.

I’m so guilty of building up my daughter’s image of her body and self and tearing down my own in the very next breathe.

Such as:
Me: Hey Beautiful, I love your outfit today! You look really cute!
Jaizy: Thank you Mommy! You look really pretty, too!
Me: Oh, thanks, but I know you’re just being sweet. This is a really old shirt.

WTH? Why do we do that to ourselves. Not only that, but we are devaluing our children’s words!

Also:
(Scene: Driving down the street, a car looks like it’s going to pull in front of me)
Me: Oh my goodness! Don’t they know not to scare fat people!
Jaizy: Mommy, you’re not fat, you’re perfect.
Me, Oh, Aren’t you funny! I know that I’m fat, it’s ok!

Again, I just basically called her a liar. When in fact, I am perfect to her. She doesn’t know me any other way and she loves me just the way I am. And it’s not like me being fat is a secret. EVERYONE can see it!

Just last night:
(Scene: I was removing my makeup)
Jaizy: Mommy, you’re so pretty, you don’t even need makeup! I like you better without it!
Me: Thank you! But Mommy likes to wear makeup. It makes me feel better.

Almost… but not quite. Why do we have to justify it? And why would makeup make me feel better? I could have just left it at I like it. End of story.

So, my goal moving forward to to give value to her (and other’s) words to me. People probably aren’t lying to my face when they give me a compliment, right?

Basically, live what I say.

Ok, second:
While I was walking Jaizy to her classroom, the most amazing thing happened.
I came out to my car and started to leave because I had just enough time to get to work on time. I noticed a piece of white paper and thought nothing of it for a second. Then I took a closer look and saw it was an envelope, so I thought someone just dropped off a random note.
And then I looked closer.

It was an envelope and on the front it said: May God Bless You!

What on earth? I thought…

And while I was driving the .75 miles to work I opened the envelope and burst into tears because inside was cash.

Cash. Money. More than $20 less than $1000. (That’s all I’m going to say about that.)

But the timing… Perfect.

So while I’m figuring out how to accept compliments I will be thinking of how I can pay acts of kindness forward.

 

Flashback December 12, 2011

Filed under: Family — Desiree @ 10:44 pm
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–Copy and pasted from my **old** myspace account.
Oct 8, 2006

It’s a girl

Current mood:anxious
We found out that we are having a girl. For some strange reason this scares/worries me. I don’t really relate to girls well, never really did. And I remember what I was like (especially as a teen-ager) and that is what really worries me the most! I mean, I had 4 kids by the time I was 23! Does it matter that we were married, and that we wanted our kids young? Maybe.
So now with 3 boys, we have to look foward to the “girlie” stuff, (did I mention that I HATE the color pink?) and of course the boys, who by the way are 8, 9 and 11 years old, are way excited to have a baby sister on the way. Matthew (my oldest) had to inform me that when Jaidelyn (that’s going to be her name) is his age (11) he’ll be 22! What the hell is that?!?!?! He’ll be finishing up college and she won’t even be in middle school yet!
I’m sure I’m freaking out unnecessarily. I was a girl. I have a sister. My boys are pretty well adjusted and behaved. I just worry about having a “mini-me” running around. I don’t even get along with myself half the time! BTW— Jason couldn’t be any more excited! I guess it’s only fair that he gets his “little girl,” since I have my “boys.”
___________________________________________________________________
My daughter turns 5 in a few days.  I’m shocked how fast the time has gone.  I don’t know why, I have three other children who are all now teenagers.  I mean, I GET how fast that seemed to go!  I guess with all the life transitions we’ve had this year, I feel like I’ve lost some time somewhere.
5… amazing!
BTW- If you ever want to see how much you’ve grown, go log into your myspace account and you’ll instantly feel more “grown-up.”
 

This is how I’ve been living my life lately: September 18, 2011

Filed under: Family,Other — Desiree @ 11:19 pm
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No time for haters!

And I’m ok with that.  For now.

And if the image doesn’t show up for you, don’t hate, just click!  Then all will be revealed.  I’m just too tired to figure it out right now.

 

Work, work, work. Work, work, work. September 5, 2011

Filed under: Family,Other — Desiree @ 8:55 pm
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I am just so not used to this.  Working full time.  It’s exhausting me.  I feel behind.  With sleep, wife duties, mom duties, me-duties.  I haven’t been eating as regularly as I had been. Adjusting to a new schedule.  I’m trying.  I’m eating decent choices, just not at regular intervals like I worked so hard to get into in the first place. And work schedule is changing again.  More than likely temporary, which means more change down the road.  But I’m rolling with it.  It’s good. I like my job.  I like where we moved to (not the house, but the area/town) and I know we have made the right decision. The boys start school tomorrow.  I know they are nervous.  Not only are they starting a new year, but new schools too.  And not just new schools, but in a totally new district.  They know just about no one.  They have met a few people, but don’t “know” anyone.  I hope they first day is kind to them.  Matthew technically doesn’t need to go tomorrow since it’s Freshman orientation day, but he’s going so he can become orientated with the school and I think, just a little, to be a support to Nathan, who IS a freshman. Caden is starting 8th grade tomorrow.  I can’t believe it.  He has been welcomed into the new district, over-throwing his expulsion.  I’m so grateful.  They took a look at his WHOLE transcript and school history and realized that what had happened (long, boring story) was an isolated incident, not 100% his fault and not worthy of the punishment he was given.  YAY!  So back to regular school he goes. A new change in our lives is that Jaizy is going to child care.  Without me.  This has been a hard decision to decide what is best for her, our family and my sanity.  I’m sure we (I) have made the right decision and I’m confident that she is going to LOVE it!  She will only be there for a few hours a day so that’s even better.  She is so excited to be going to “school” but will have to wait just one more day, because her first day isn’t until Wednesday. My back to school breakfast in the morning?  Oy, I have no idea what I’m making.  I was thinking about Cinnamon Rolls, but I just don’t think I have the time.  Maybe I can make the time…  Last year’s back to school breakfast was so good! It’ll be hard to meet or beat. Hope you all have a great back to school week!

 

Um… I suck! June 28, 2011

Filed under: Family — Desiree @ 4:04 pm
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Here I promise to post more and then I don’t. Well, I have a handy dandy excuse, if you care. If not, oh well.
Life had been a basket full of crazy! Where to even start! I’ve been attempting to keep facebook somewhat updated, but even then things slip through the cracks.
But here I am, relaxing on the couch, kids upstairs (one of the new things- house with upstairs) chilling after a full morning at the unemployment office – oh yeah, that’s another one of the new things to deal with – and wait for a phone call from the new school district on whether or not Caden gets to be enrolled in their regular school or have to go to a private school.
Uh-huh, I told you lots of changes, didn’t I mention that?
And oh, by the way? I have a ridiculous amount of romance items for sale cheap, cheap, cheap since BBP went out of business. Contact me to get a list! I ship all over!

 

My Jaidelyn July 6, 2010

Filed under: Family — Desiree @ 4:03 pm
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Oh, how I love having my own little Jaidelyn.  I’m not sure I enjoy getting paid back the naughty little things I did when I was little by ten fold.  I mean, really, the only really naughty things I can remember doing is buttering the dog (No wisecracks!) and painting my blankie with nail polish.  I mean come on!  Not such a big deal when you consider all that Jaidelyn does in a day!

Here is a view of the last 24 hours:

Jaidelyn is playing in the dirt pile like it is Sand.  Ok, not so bad, cute even.  She’s throwing it, running it through her fingers, building little dirt mounds.  Ok, so obviously Jaizy needs sand in her sand and water table.  Gotcha.

Jaidelyn takes a shower.  Not such a big deal, except that she kinda hates it.  She does ok tonight and we get that job done.  Mom (me) goes to pick up Bubba from his girl’s house while Jason finishes bathing the babe and I come home to find little itty bitty pieces of paper in Jaizy’s room with *gasp* is that hair! on the floor.  There are scissors on her floor in the middle of the mess.  Oh my!  “Jaidelyn, it is NEVER ok to have scissors in your room!  If you want to cut you need to ask and do it with someone bigger at the table!”  “Ok Mommy.  I’m sowwy.”

Today:

Where’s my water?  It was right here… I turn around and Jaidelyn has my water cup on the floor with rocks in it as she takes the rocks out and lets the dog lick it.  Then it goes back into the water cup to start all over again.  “Um… Jaidelyn, is that my water?”  “Yes!  Sowwy mommy!”

(See a pattern?)

Jason comes out of the shower today after work and says there is a box lid in Jaidelyn’s room and it’s soaking wet.  On her wood floor.  I go get it, examine the room and ask her what it is.

“Water.  Sowwy mommy.”

“Where did you get the water?”

“From my soappy water buckets.”

“Show me.”

She runs into the living room and grabs two metal buckets off her bouncy horse that are bone dry.

“Where is the water?”

“In the bathroom!”  Mommy must be stupid to ask that questions!  (I’m sure she was thinking this.)

“Show me.”

“Ok Mommy!” She runs into the bathroom.  “Right there.”

There is toilet paper in the sink.  What on earth was she doing?  And when?  I checked on her like 3 times during rest time and she was hanging around me the rest of the time?  Geez!

“Show me what you did.”

“It was soap water.  Sowwy.”

“What soap water?”

“”Right there.”

“Show me.”  You see how this is going.  She points, I ask ‘show me’ and we go round and round.  Eventually I tell her (again) she is NOT to have any water in her bedroom and what she did is wrong and she needs to go to time-out.

If three year olds could melt!  She runs into time-out and yells, “I DIDN’T GET ANY BREAKFAST!”

WTH?  It’s 3:30 pm, you have eaten numerous times today.  “I will get you cereal for snack, like I was doing before I noticed you soaked a box with water on your hardwood floor when you are done with time out!  Geez!”

“Sowwy Mommy.  I love you.”

“I love you too Jaizy.”

Jaidelyn

I'm so cute, I could NEVER get into trouble!

ETA:  This is also the same little princess who likes to get into trouble and blame it on the monsters/elephants/ocean.

For example:

About a month ago:
Jaizy is sitting at the desk watching something on nickjr.com and I notice one of the ipod cords has a hole in it, with wires exposed.
Me:  OMG!  What happened to this!  It’s a fire hazard, does anyone know what happened?  Jaidelyn:  The elephant did it.
Me:  What?    …   The elephant… ate it?
Jaizy:  Yea, the elephant came in and ate it.
Me:  What elephant?
Jaizy:  The elephant that eats the wire!
(Notice there is no “sowwy” involved.)  She finally admitted to biting the wire.

A couple of weeks ago:
Jaizy:  Help!  Help!  I’m stuck!
Jason investigates and finds Jaizy stuck climbing up her armoire and helps her down.  “How did you get up there?”
Jaizy: The monster put me up there!
Jason:  Oh, the monster, huh.  Bad monster.
(See the significant difference in our parenting?)

From just this afternoon:
Jaizy:  Digging through armiore looking for panties.
Me:  Jaizy, where are your pants?
Jaizy:  They are wet.  (I already saw them on the bathroom floor.)
Me:  Why are they wet?
Jaizy:  From the water!
Me:  What water?  (Really, why do I do this to myself?)
Jaizy:  From the ocean!

I really should add that we live at least 70 miles away from the ocean.  So, clearly she has quite an imagination.  Oh, and the desire to tell amazing stories that aren’t all that amazing.

 

Happy Mother’s Day! May 9, 2010

Filed under: Family — Desiree @ 8:07 am
Tags: , , ,

I just wanted to take a moment and wish all you mothers out there a Happy Mother’s Day.

I’ve realized something this year that I have never realized before.  I had always had the impression Mother’s Day was a “Hallmark” holiday and is just used to be materialistic and commercial.

And then I started working for Hallmark.  And I read all the cards.  And there really is a card for everything!

And my wish for you is to take a moment and not only reflect on what your mother did for you, but what you carry through to for your own child(ren).  Maybe you don’t have children yet, so consider what was important to you as a child and what you want to carry through.

Maybe your mother wasn’t the best mother.  Maybe she was a terrible mother.  There are lessons learned from that as well.  Maybe you’ve decided children aren’t for you.   And that’s ok too.

I recently thought about single moms.  Most especially young, single moms and whatever reason they find themselves parenting alone doesn’t matter, but that I hope they get the recognition of a mother’s day for themselves.  If they are young, they probably don’t have children who attend school, who make crafts, who may not even be aware it’s a “special” day.  And maybe they are estranged from their families for whatever reasons.  And it’s especially important that they are acknowledged for the good job they are doing, or that they are capable of doing.  If you know someone who is parenting alone and their child is young, please reach out and just give them a “Happy Mother’s Day!”  It’ll mean a lot to them, I’m sure.

I don’t expect anything for Mother’s Day.  Except maybe a hug or two, a kind word, and no arguing!  (Who am I kidding, I have teenagers!)  I have requested that my mom-van get washed on the outside from my kids and I hope it does!  I have a nice dinner planned, which I will cook myself.

And I will sit back and be grateful for my husband and children, who have made me a wonderful mom and given me the opportunity to celebrate a day just for that!